Good morning! I hope the world is being good to you and you’re being good to it.

Grab your coffee or beverage of choice and share a thought with me!

Roku’s LiveTV has proven to be a source of infinite wonder. I don’t typically seek out something to watch on Roku’s smorgasbord of free offerings, but the myriad channels’ offerings of classic television and non-stop movies makes for good background noise. The other day, I caught the Paramount Movies channel playing Tremors, which is one of my favorite comfort movies. If you’ve never seen it, please treat yourself. From Kevin Bacon to Reba McEntire, the film is a delight from the transitory period of 80’s into 90’s cinema. So, seeing Tremors was playing, I threw it on the small kitchen TV to provide a soundtrack to my various household chores.

A little later, after ignoring the TV for a bit, I reentered the kitchen to the surprise of Tremors 2: Aftershocks. Now, the sequel is not as beloved as the original, but I have vivid memories of HBO airing the follow-up at least twice a day for a month during summer break. You better believe I watched it an unnecessary number of times. While not as cherished, Tremors 2 holds a special place in my nostalgic heart.

Several hours later, there’s still a Tremors movie playing. This time, it’s Tremors: A Cold Day in Hell. Okay, I’m not particularly interested in this one and have never seen it. I’m not even sure I knew it existed. We’re getting into low B-movie, possibly C-movie territory here.

An hour later, yessir, we still have Tremors, but we are now on Tremors: Shrieker Island, starring Napoleon Dynamite himself, Jon Heder. Friends, I guarantee I was not aware of this movie, and even if you showed me the poster or blu-ray (DVD, maybe? We may be past the worthiness of physical media.) I would’ve sworn it was parody, like Scary Movie to Scream. Like the graboids themselves, Tremors is apparently a franchise that will not die.

Do you want to know how many Tremors franchise movies exist in the world? Seven. There are seven movies and a SyFy series to fill out the happy Tremors family at a robust EIGHT. Even more amazing, Michael Gross, who plays gun-happy prepper Burt Gummer, is in every, single, one – even the television series. If there was going to be a character to span the years and give these films inexplicable consistency, Burt would be the one.

So what do I do with this information now? I’m still agog that there are eight entries in what has become an anthology. I don’t understand how the franchise has persevered and had enough story to deliver that much content. This leads me to really the only plausible answer: I must watch them all.